The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.- Frank Lloyd Wright (1869-1959)

How many mixes have I made for someone else? Tonight one was given to me. For the past two days, I've been smiling... floating... happy.

Dating of Carrie Smith Memo:

In an effort to not waste my time or yours please note the following:

~Family is everything to me

~The drive to see me is worth it

~I am looking for no less than eternity

~I don't drink, so don't try to convince me to start

~Friends of both sexes are important to me and I want to spend time with them as well

~My belief is that a gentleman is a man who knows that he can move lines, but chooses not to

~I have things in my past that still hurt

~If you have an opinion, share it and then let go if I don't want to change mine

~Honesty IS the best policy.

Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Act for yourself. Speak for yourself. Be yourself. Imitation is suicide. -Marva Collins

Ed, I love you. You are such a good guy and an amazing friend. Part of me gets so excited of the thought of anything with you... and then there is the part that is completely freaked out. When I'm talking with you I play it down a lot. So here is the honest to goodness truth:

Me liking you was something I thought was buried and gone. Probably because it sucked so much when things didn't work out... that whole few months sucked... I got over you. I was okay; enjoying just being your friend. Then when you texted me and there was that tiny glimpse of "maybe" it was like tumbling down a hill covered in snow. It was an invigorating circle that you feel all over. . .then when you land at the bottom, the snow starts to seep into your socks and you start to shiver. . .

Corny analogy, but I'm shivering right now. How many times have we talked about your "perfect woman"? . . . and I can't even tell you how different that woman and I are. I'm 5'2, not athletic, I can be stubborn as hell and crumble into tears at the drop of a hat. You and I can fight. . .and hold grudges.

All that being said, I still love you. I still value as my confidant. I still want to kick your trash at air hockey. . . and I'm ready to be torn up inside. Be selfish myself.

Feel the fear and do it anyway. -Susan Jeffers

To Doll, Mo, and Gibby:

I freaked... and I am SO sorry. Maybe you having a three musketeers thing is how it should be... I just don't know that it is possible for me to fit back in with you...

To Ed:

Thank you.

Things I learned today:

- Never say that you're getting ahead of the game... it doesn't stay that way.
- I make one cute witch
- MD is officially hot
- It hurts more to be dismissed than forgotten
- Missing people doesn't go away...

Great things in my life right now:

- Awesome friends that have been around a while
- Being in the Manager Training program
- Moved out of my parents house
- Meeting new people
- Great roommates
- Hot guys in the ward
- Awesome training manager
- Awesome crew
- Increased pay
- College atmosphere


Life is good.

In the words of Helga "You know when someone is really ready to move on when you butt heads with them and their side makes sense."

ALLELUIA!